popping

…to say hello

Some disappointments and some achievements and life goes on!  Trying to find my positive mojo again.

Noah wants to move our baby making back to October.  My argument of “why do three months really matter to you” is easily turned around on me and I don’t have a logical answer.

Money is tight when you’re trying to pay off debt.  Noah doesn’t really seem to grasp the concept of saving money.  Plus a lot of things have come up that we have been putting off and they cost money.  At least we’re paying for them out of pocket instead of putting them on a credit card.  We finally, after 5 months, managed to refinance our house.  It’s a win because it’s $200 extra a month.  But it sucks because if they had actually acted on it when we started this process, we could have saved $1000.  That’s a chunk of change!

My ankle is occasionally fine and occasionally throbs.  This rain and gloomy weather doesn’t lend itself to working out.  Two weeks ago I got 18 running miles and 28 biking miles in.  Last week I got 12 running miles, 28 biking miles, and 600 yards of swimming in.  This week I am 0 for 0!  But hopefully the rain will let up and I can get outside tomorrow.

There are only 15 days of school left.  Where did the school year go?  And I am once again trying to figure out what to do next year.  And what effect that will have on our lives in the “future”.  Hypothetical future and hypothetical family.  I know people say you can’t worry about it, you have to do what’s best for you right now.  To those people I say, have you met me?  I’m a worrier and a planner and you could tell the wind to stop blowing before I can change that about myself.  I am working on it but…it’s hard.  This district that I work for is so disorganized and apathetic.  There haven’t been any internal job postings yet!  None!  I can’t apply for other jobs within the district, b/c as of five minutes ago, there aren’t any!  So I’m trying to decide if I want to apply out of district this year.  And if so, it needs to be the last time I change until we move.  I can’t hop around from district to district.  Trying to decide where to go kind of depends on where we want to live in the future.  Grrr.

And we’re back around to the fact that we’ve pushed baby making back to October.  I’m so frustrated by it.  Far more upset than Noah knows.  He definitely doesn’t understand.  He can’t help.  He can’t make it better.

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2 thoughts on “popping

  1. Why does he want to move it back? I mean, if you wait until October, then you won’t have a baby until July which doesn’t really mesh well with your teaching schedule, right? Wouldn’t it be better to have a baby say in, May? And, what if you can’t get pregnant right away? It’s a little arrogant to assume you’d get pregnant after one time of trying, yes? So you probably need to start a few months earlier than you really want to just in case it doesn’t happen that first month! (Just trying to think of arguments to help your cause! :))

  2. I agree with Liz’s comments. For most people it takes a few months of trying. I just started my third year of med school, and my husband and I can’t seem to figure out when we should try to plan for a baby. It’s not that we disagree, but with me being in the middle of school it always seems like the present time is the wrong time to start trying….but, how long will we keep pushing it back? I’m still only 26, but I do worry a little about fertility problems if we wait too long. It’s tough. Good luck to y’all!

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